Dear Olive Branch
Shifting Hurting Power to Helping Power
Words have power. When the choice of how you use your words comes to tearing down or lifting up. Which will you choose? — The Power of Words, January 5, 2022
Introduction
When we think of power we can go in many directions. Sometimes when we think about power, it is viewed as a negative. What we want to do in the column this month, is to focus on using power for helping self and others. You have the power to shift from hurting to helping.
To Build Trust: Focus on the Positive
As a professor, I have noticed, particularly around midterms, my student teachers have a hard time settling into classroom activities. They just are not ready for the day’s discussion. It may be on a day where other professors have difficult assignments due. My reaction to their struggles is to check-in with the students to ask them how their day is going. I have the students tell me one activity that they did in the last 24 hours where they were successful. Having done this activity with young children, I wondered how it would work with student teachers. So, depending on my day, I may say as an example, that I found both of my shoes. That usually brings a bit of a laugh, and then the students will list what they have done, which can range from turning in an assignment that was due or finding time to talk to a friend. Stating the small things that they have accomplished takes the pressure off themselves, and helps them to realize that they are competent, and can indeed, do college. Sharing helps me understand where they are coming from, as well as opening the door to talk to me later about the more serious events that are happening in their lives. Building trust with my students is an essential goal, and using the seemingly small accomplishments of the students builds trust between the students, and myself as well as between each other. (D. Satterlee)
The Book List
I’ve been thinking a lot about the issue of banning books for children lately. It reminded me of my high school years. Every summer we would receive this long list of books. We had to read two and report on them when we returned to school in the fall. On the list one year was Cry the Beloved Country by Alan Paton. Alan Paton was a writer from South Africa, and he wrote several books about that country during the time of apartheid. I knew nothing about apartheid before I read the novel, and I learned a lot about the unfair and cruel practices of apartheid when reading this book.
We had the option of doing an oral book review of one of the books we read when we returned to school. I chose this option. By sharing this book with others in my English class I learned that many of my classmates knew nothing about apartheid. We all learned, and several of us read some of Paton’s other books. We knew what this policy was when the United Nations condemned apartheid in South Africa, thanks to the book. That list of books provided a diversity of reading experiences for me and my fellow students.
All my life I’ve read and learned about history – both the stories of amazing people who worked to make sure everyone is respected, and the stories like Cry, the Beloved Country, where people fell short of that. The stories prompted me to make changes and support policies that give everyone the respect they deserve. I believe that is what education for our children is about - to encourage critical thinking and problem solving.
I am grateful to my teachers who provided the opportunity to learn and trusted that we could take the best ideas from the books we read. (J. Daniels)
Power Helpers
Once upon a time… quite some time ago… there was a group of young children who watched TV cartoons and saw “superheroes” doing powerful behaviors such as fighting and yelling. They had weapons and they hurt people using their power. The children, who were trying to understand power, were impressed with these superheroes and imitated their behavior at school. The classroom became a battleground of fighting and yelling to determine who could grab the most power. It was not a safe place!
The teacher carefully observed this behavior, asked the children about it, watched some more…and even took time to see what the children were watching on TV. Then she organized a class meeting. At the meeting she facilitated a discussion about the importance of “helping power.” She explained to the children that helpers are needed and that they are powerful as they help others. The children contributed to the discussion by naming the many ways they could become “Power Helpers”! It was decided that Power Helpers were so important that each day a special Power Helper should be chosen to help as needed.
From that time forth the children recognized that power can be used for helping rather than hurting. They could be heard asking one another, “Are you using your helping power?” They all had the language to address behavior in a positive way to bring about a change in behavior as needed. The teacher’s observation of the children’s behavior, then the class discussion, and finally the resolution of using the issue that the children were trying to understand, all shifted from negative to positive. What an incredible lesson in using power for good! (S. Hopkins)
Steps in Shifting Power
There are appropriate time/situations where it is necessary to use power, to give directions. These are times of emergency where you do not want to share power. A challenge is to be mindful of when you are using power that you could be sharing.
It is common for adults to unintentionally do too much for others. This can be an example of hurting power. When we do for others what they can do for themselves we don’t let them learn. We are in effect saying, “You are incapable, you are helpless, you are nothing, you are not trustworthy.”
Of course, the timing of when a child’s muscles and concentration are ready varies. But sometimes it is hard to watch as a child practices to learn to pour their own drink and spills it.
One can scaffold help and ease off on the helping as the child is ready to do the task on their own. An example of scaffolding would be:
Adult power: Pours milk and keeps area clean and dry
Step 1
Child puts their hands on the pitcher while you pour the milk
Step 2
Child holds the pitcher with your hands as backup.
Step 3
Third step is child doing it alone.
Child power: “I can do it myself,” learned how to pour without spilling
(M. Shelton)
NOTE: We chose “Dear Olive Branch” as the title for this column for several reasons – foremost as a sign of peace. Also olives come in many colors, sizes, tastes, uses – a sign of diversity just as there are many types of questions and those who send the questions. We hope “Olive’s” responses will help you, the reader – if you have a question for Olive send it to our email address. When Olive isn’t available to answer questions, members of EPCC and/or P.E.A.C.E. will step up to help.
Olive’s Next Topic: Empowered Children, Empowered Parents
We are looking for your questions and/or short stories regarding Changing Trends. Please submit your ideas by October 31, 2023. Word range: 150-300 words.
This article is part of our Summer 2023 Newsletter. See all articles.
